Joel Osteen Funny Quotes | Hilarious And Inspirational Sayings From Joel Osteen

If you are looking for a good laugh and some dose of inspiration, then you are in the right place! Joel Osteen, the well-known American pastor and author, has a knack for delivering funny yet thought-provoking quotes. His humorous and insightful sayings are guaranteed to put a smile on your face and make you see life from a different perspective.

With his unique blend of wit and wisdom, Joel Osteen has won the hearts of millions around the world. His quotes are not only hilarious but also carry a powerful message of hope, faith, and positivity. They remind us to not take life too seriously and to find joy in the simple things. Whether you are going through a tough time or just need a pick-me-up, Joel Osteen’s funny quotes will surely lift your spirits and brighten your day.

So, get ready to laugh and be inspired as we take a look at some of the funniest and most memorable quotes from Joel Osteen. From witty one-liners to clever observations about life, these quotes will not only tickle your funny bone but also encourage you to embrace happiness, gratitude, and a positive outlook on life.

Joel Osteen Funny Quotes

While known for his inspirational and uplifting messages, Joel Osteen also has a playful side. Here are some funny quotes from Joel Osteen that will surely make you smile:

1. “If you don’t have a smile, I’ll give you one of mine.”

2. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.”

3. “The only time my prayers don’t get answered is when I press the wrong button on the remote control.”

4. “I don’t have a fancy chef. I make my own waffles in the shape of Jesus.”

5. “I once met a man who had a fear of elevators. I told him, ‘Don’t worry, it’s just a step up!'”

6. “My doctor told me I need to exercise more. So now I walk to the fridge at least once a day.”

7. “I don’t have any grey hair. I have ‘wisdom highlights’.”

8. “They say laughter is the best medicine. That’s why I always have a full medicine cabinet of jokes.”

9. “I like to think of myself as a professional life coach. But really, I’m just an expert at making people feel good about themselves.”

10. “I asked God for a bike, but I know that’s not how it works. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness instead.”

These funny quotes from Joel Osteen remind us that laughter is an important part of life and can help us navigate through the ups and downs with a positive attitude.

Hilarious and Inspirational Sayings

In addition to being known for his inspirational messages, Joel Osteen has a knack for injecting humor into his sermons. Here are some hilarious and inspirational sayings from Joel Osteen:

“You can change your world by changing your words.”

“When the negative thoughts come – and they will; they come to all of us – it’s not enough to just not dwell on it… You’ve got to replace it with a positive thought.”

“You’re going to go through tough times – that’s life. But I say, ‘Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.’ See the positive in negative events.”

“Choosing to be positive and having a grateful attitude is going to determine how you’re going to live your life.”

“You have to come to your closed doors before you can come to your open doors. What if you knew you had to go through 32 closed doors before you got to your open door? Well, then you’d come to closed door number eight and you’d think, ‘Great, I got another one out of the way’… Keep knocking on those doors, because they’re all going to open.”

“God wants you to have a good life, a life filled with love, joy, peace, and fulfillment. That doesn’t mean it will always be easy, but it does mean that it will always be worth it.”

The Humorous Side of Joel Osteen

While Joel Osteen is known for his inspirational messages and uplifting sermons, he also has a funny side that often comes out during his speaking engagements. His humor adds a light-hearted element to his teachings, making them even more relatable and enjoyable for his audience.

One of Joel Osteen’s famous funny quotes is, “I’m not only a member of the ‘Tired Club,’ I’m also the president!” This quote perfectly captures the common feeling of exhaustion that many people can relate to. It shows that even someone as positive and motivated as Joel Osteen can have moments of fatigue.

Funny Quote Explanation
“I like to think of myself as a spiritual comedian. I make people laugh, and then I give them something to think about.” This quote showcases Joel Osteen’s ability to combine humor with spirituality. He understands the power of laughter in creating a positive atmosphere and uses it as a tool to deliver his messages effectively.
“I told my children they can be anything they want to be. Now they want to be actors, musicians, and athletes. Should have been more specific!” This quote highlights Joel Osteen’s relatability as a parent. It shows that he has a sense of humor about the challenges of raising children and the unexpected career paths they may choose.
“My wife always says that I never meet a stranger. She’s right. I talk to people everywhere I go. In fact, sometimes I forget to talk to my own family!” This quote demonstrates Joel Osteen’s friendly and outgoing nature. It reveals his ability to connect with people from all walks of life and his dedication to spreading positivity and kindness.

These humorous quotes from Joel Osteen remind us that even in the midst of life’s challenges, it’s essential to find joy and laughter. By infusing humor into his messages, he creates a welcoming and light-hearted environment, allowing his audience to feel uplifted and inspired.

Laugh with Joel Osteen

Joel Osteen is known for his uplifting and inspiring messages, but he also has a great sense of humor. His funny quotes are not only hilarious but also provide a refreshing perspective on life. Let’s take a moment to laugh with Joel Osteen and enjoy some of his humorous sayings that will brighten up your day:

1. “I don’t think people realize that they give you the gift of dumbness when you become a parent. You used to be able to put together a TV stand, and now you can’t assemble a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.”

2. “Do you know why I never make mistakes? Because I learned from my wife. She never lets me forget them.”

3. “I’ve learned that laughter is like a windshield wiper, it doesn’t stop the rain but allows us to keep going.”

4. “I used to be normal. Then I met my wife, and there went my sanity.”

5. “I don’t sing in the shower, I perform. Sometimes I even have a guest appearance by the shampoo bottle.”

6. “My wife asked me if I ever fantasize about other women. I told her, ‘No, I can’t even finish one fantasy before she interrupts with her important questions!'”

7. “My mom always said that laughter is the best medicine. That’s why every time I visit her, I bring a joke book instead of flowers.”

8. “I love when people ask me if they can speak to the manager. Sure, I am the manager, and I’m also the janitor, the receptionist, and the motivational speaker!”

9. “If brooms could fly, my house would be a major airport.”

10. “I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.”

These funny quotes from Joel Osteen remind us that even in the midst of challenges and difficulties, laughter can bring us joy and lighten our spirits. So, let’s not forget to smile, laugh, and enjoy the journey of life!

Famous Quotes by Joel Osteen

Joel Osteen is known for his inspiring and uplifting messages that have touched the lives of millions around the world. Here are some famous quotes by Joel Osteen:

“You were not created to just get by with an average, unrewarding, or unfulfilling life. God created you to leave your mark on this generation.”
“The more you talk about negative things in your life, the more you call them in. Speak victory not defeat.”
“God knows your value; He sees your potential. You may not understand everything you are going through right now. But hold your head up high, knowing that God is in control and he has a great plan and purpose for your life.”
“Don’t waste your energy trying to convince people to understand you. Your time is too valuable to try to prove yourself to people.”
“You don’t have to figure it all out, you just have to take the first step.”
“When you go through a disappointment, when you go through a loss, don’t stop on that page. You gotta keep moving forward.”
“You can change your world by changing your words… Remember, life and death is in the power of the tongue.”
“The size of your dreams must always exceed your current capacity to achieve them. If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough.”

These quotes by Joel Osteen remind us of the power of positivity and the importance of having faith in ourselves and in God’s plan for our lives. They encourage us to dream big and to keep pushing forward even in the face of obstacles. Whether you’re looking for inspiration or a reminder of your own worth and potential, these famous quotes by Joel Osteen are sure to uplift and motivate you.

Joel Osteen’s Wit and Wisdom

Joel Osteen, the renowned pastor and motivational speaker, is not only known for his uplifting and inspirational messages but also for his wit and wisdom. Through his humorous remarks, Joel Osteen brings a lighter side to his teachings, making his advice relatable and enjoyable.

Here are some of Joel Osteen’s funny quotes that are sure to make you smile:

“I told my kids that when they’re old enough to date, their first date will be with me.”

“If I ever start a band, I think I’ll call it Joel and the Positives.”

“I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.”

“You may have big problems, but you serve an even bigger God.”

“I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It’s probably the most important thing in a person.”

“Life is better when you’re laughing.”

Joel Osteen’s wit and humor serve as a reminder that it’s important to find joy and laughter in life, even during challenging times. By infusing his teachings with humor, he helps his audience feel uplifted, encouraged, and motivated to face any obstacles that come their way.

So, the next time you need a dose of laughter and inspiration, turn to Joel Osteen’s funny quotes and let his wit and wisdom brighten your day!

Joyful Words from Joel Osteen

Joel Osteen, a renowned pastor and author, is known for his powerful words of encouragement and positivity. Through his sermons, books, and speeches, he inspires millions of people around the world to live a life filled with joy and hope. Here are some joyful words from Joel Osteen that will uplift your spirit and bring a smile to your face:

1. “Choose to be happy today. Don’t wait for someone else to bring you joy.”

2. “Don’t let your circumstances dictate your happiness. You have the power to create your own joy.”

3. “Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to stay positive in the midst of them.”

4. “God has given you the gift of life. Embrace it with gratitude and find joy in every moment.”

5. “A joyful heart is like a magnet. It attracts blessings and opportunities.”

6. “Let go of negativity and surround yourself with people who bring joy and laughter into your life.”

7. “Laugh often, for laughter is the music of the soul. It lifts your spirit and brings lightness to your days.”

8. “Every day is a gift. Choose to live it joyfully and make a positive impact on those around you.”

9. “Find joy in the journey, not just in reaching the destination. Life is too short to wait for happiness.”

10. “Remember, you are never alone. God is always with you, guiding you and filling your life with joy.”

These joyful words from Joel Osteen remind us that happiness is a choice and a way of life. Embrace joy, spread positivity, and let your light shine brightly for all to see.

Motivational Quotes for Everyday Life

In our daily lives, it’s easy to get caught up in the monotony and challenges that come our way. However, sometimes all it takes is a little motivation to push through and achieve our goals. Here are some motivational quotes that can inspire us to keep going and make the most out of every day:

“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”

– Theodore Roosevelt

“The only way to do great work is to love what you do.”

– Steve Jobs

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.”

– Winston Churchill

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

– Eleanor Roosevelt

“Don’t watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.”

– Sam Levenson

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”

– Albert Schweitzer

These quotes remind us that we have the power to achieve greatness and overcome any obstacles that come our way. They encourage us to never give up and to always stay focused on our dreams. So, the next time you feel demotivated or overwhelmed, remember these words of wisdom and let them inspire you to keep pushing forward.

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