Best Quotes From The Jerk Movie

The Jerk is a beloved comedy film that was released in 1979. Directed by Carl Reiner, the movie stars Steve Martin in the lead role as Navin Johnson, a naive and eccentric man who sets out on a journey to find himself. With its hilarious script and memorable characters, The Jerk has remained a fan favorite for decades.

One of the reasons why The Jerk has stood the test of time is its collection of memorable quotes. Whether it’s Navin’s naive observations or the wacky one-liners from supporting characters, there’s no shortage of quotable moments in this film. From Navin declaring, “I was born a poor black child” to his famous catchphrase, “He hates these cans!” The Jerk is full of comedic gold.

In addition to the unforgettable quotes, The Jerk also contains a deeper message about the importance of identity and finding your place in the world. Navin’s journey from rags to riches and back again serves as a reminder that true happiness comes from within, not material possessions. It’s this combination of humor and heart that has made The Jerk a timeless classic.

So, whether you’re a fan of Steve Martin or just enjoy a good laugh, The Jerk is a must-watch film. Its quotable quotes and relatable themes are sure to leave you entertained and pondering life’s bigger questions. As Navin himself might say, “I’m not a bum. I’m a jerk!”

Quotes that will make you laugh from The Jerk Movie

  • “I was born a poor black child.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I don’t need anything, except this lamp. And that’s all I need.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “He hates these cans!” – Navin R. Johnson’s mother
  • “I will give my daddy’s watch to you, and Mama said when you wear it, it means you’re a man.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m picking out a thermos for you, not an ordinary thermos for you, but the extra best thermos that you can buy, with vinyl and stripes and a cup built right in.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “Well, I’m gonna go then. And I don’t need any of this. I don’t need this stuff, and I don’t need you. I don’t need anything except this.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m somebody now! Millions of people look at this book everyday! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity – your name in print – that makes people! I’m in print! Things are going to start happening to me!” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “These cans! He hates these cans!” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m right on top of that, Rose!” – Bernadette Peters
  • “The new phone book’s here! The new phone book’s here! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity… I gotta be ready for it. I mean, this is bigger than my inventions.” – Navin R. Johnson

Classic one-liners from The Jerk

“I was born a poor black child.”

This famous quote, delivered by Steve Martin’s character Navin R. Johnson, sets the humorous tone for the entire movie. Navin’s ignorance and naivety are evident from the very beginning.

“I don’t need anything. Except this paddle game, the remote control, the chair, and the lamp. That’s all I need.”

A hilarious example of Navin’s materialistic simplicity. He genuinely believes that these few possessions are all he needs to live a fulfilled life.

“I’m picking out a Thermos for you. Not an ordinary Thermos, a Thermos for you.”

Navin’s attempt to find the perfect gift for his love interest, Marie, showcases his innocent and endearing nature. He genuinely believes that a Thermos would be the best present.

“He hates these cans!”

Navin’s exclamation when a shooter takes aim at oil cans, mistaking them for his family. This line is a perfect example of Navin’s childlike innocence and simple understanding of the world.

“I’m not a bum. I’m a jerk. I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends and… uh… my Thermos.”

Navin’s reflection on his life in a homeless shelter captures his growth and maturity. Despite losing everything, he realizes the importance of friendship and the simple joy of having a Thermos.

“The new phone book’s here! The new phone book’s here!”

Navin’s excitement upon receiving the new phone book demonstrates his idiosyncratic view of the world. He finds joy in the simplest of things, even something as mundane as a phone book.

“I’m somebody now! Millions of people look at this book everyday! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity, you’re name in print, that makes people. I’m in print! Things are going to start happening to me now.”

Navin’s hilarious and delusional reaction upon seeing his name in the phone book highlights his inflated sense of self-importance. It’s a comical reminder of his naivety and ignorance.

“These cans! He hates these cans!”

Navin’s frustration when a shooter again destroys cans, mistaking them for his family. This line perfectly captures Navin’s innocence, as he struggles to comprehend the irrational actions of others.

Memorable quotes from Steve Martin’s hilarious performance

Steve Martin delivers a truly iconic performance in the classic comedy film, The Jerk. Here are some of the most memorable quotes from his hilarious portrayal of the lovable and clueless character, Navin R. Johnson:

1. “I was born a poor black child.” – Navin R. Johnson

2. “The new phone book’s here! The new phone book’s here! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need! My name in print! That really makes somebody! Things are gonna start happening to me now.” – Navin R. Johnson

3. “I know we’ve only known each other four weeks and three days, but to me, it seems like nine weeks and five days. The first day seemed like a week, and the second day seemed like five days. And the third day seemed like a week again, and the fourth day seemed like eight days. And the fifth day, you went to see your mother, and that seemed just like a day. But then you came back, and later on the sixth day, in the evening, when we saw each other, that started seeming like two days. So in the evening, it seemed like two days spilling over into the next day, and that started seeming like four days. So at the end of the sixth day, on into the seventh day, it seemed like a total of five days. And the sixth day seemed like a week and a half. I have it written down, but I can show it to you tomorrow if you want to see it.” – Navin R. Johnson

4. “I’m picking out a thermos for you. Not an ordinary thermos for you. But the extra best thermos that you can buy, with vinyl and stripes and a cup built right in.” – Navin R. Johnson

5. “You mean I’m gonna stay this color?” – Navin R. Johnson

6. “I am not a bum. I’m a jerk. I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends, and… uh… my thermos. Huh? My story? Okay. It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child.” – Navin R. Johnson

7. “Ah, well, I’m gonna go then. And I don’t need any of this. I don’t need this stuff, and I don’t need you. I don’t need anything except this. This ashtray. And this paddle game, the ashtray and the paddle game and that’s all I need. And this remote control. The ashtray, the paddle game, and the remote control, and that’s all I need. And these matches. The ashtray, and these matches, and the remote control, and the paddle ball. And this lamp. The ashtray, this paddle game, and the remote control, and the lamp, and that’s all I need. And that’s all I need too. I don’t need one other thing, not one… I need this! The paddle game and the chair, and the remote control, and the matches for sure. And this. And that’s all I need. The ashtray, the remote control, the paddle game, this magazine, and the chair.” – Navin R. Johnson

8. “It’s a profit deal. You see, I buy things, and then I sell them at a profit. It’s a profit deal.” – Navin R. Johnson

These quotes highlight the unique comedic talent and wit of Steve Martin, making The Jerk a timeless comedy that continues to bring laughter to audiences.

The funniest moments in The Jerk

  • Navin’s excitement at receiving his first paycheck from the gas station and immediately splurging on ridiculous purchases like a thermos and a chair with no legs.
  • Navin’s epic struggle to find his “special purpose” and his misunderstanding of what it actually is.
  • Navin’s attempts at being a successful inventor, including his creation of the “Opti-Grab” glasses that only cause people to go cross-eyed.
  • Navin’s relationship with Marie, which includes hilarious miscommunications and misunderstandings.
  • Navin’s journey to find his “life’s work” and his subsequent attempts at becoming a millionaire, which all ultimately fail.
  • Navin’s encounters with eccentric characters, such as the sniper who mistakes him for a target and the weightlifter who bends a crowbar with his bare hands.
  • Navin’s grandiose plans for a “million dollar idea” and his enthusiasm for even the most absurd business ventures.
  • The absurdity and randomness of Navin’s adventures, such as him accidentally becoming a carnival performer and unwittingly joining a traveling circus.
  • The ongoing theme of Navin’s complete lack of self-awareness and his innocent, childlike view of the world, which leads to a multitude of hilarious situations.
  • The film’s iconic “I’m somebody now!” scene, where Navin discovers his name in the phone book and believes he has achieved fame and fortune.

Iconic quotes that will have you in stitches

  • “I was born a poor black child.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “You mean I’m gonna stay this color?” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I don’t need anything except this lamp.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “He hates these cans!” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m picking out a thermos for you.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m somebody now! Millions of people look at this book every day! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity – your name in print – that makes people. I’m in print! Things are going to start happening to me now.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “And that’s all I need… this remote control. The paddle game and the chair, and the remote control, and the matches for sure.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “Lord loves a workin’ man; don’t trust whitey; see a doctor and get rid of it.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I don’t wanna sell anything, buy anything or process anything as a career. I don’t wanna sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought or processed, or repair anything sold, bought or processed. You know, as a career, I don’t wanna do that.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “Why are you crying? And why are you wearing that old dress?” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m sorry I ruined your lives and crammed eleven cookies into the VCR.” – Navin R. Johnson

The most quotable lines from The Jerk

As one of the most iconic comedies of all time, “The Jerk” is filled with classic and memorable quotes. Here are some of the most quotable lines from the movie:

  • “I was born a poor black child.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “He hates these cans!” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I trust dogs. I’ve just never met a dog I didn’t like.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I don’t need anything except this lamp.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “The new phonebook’s here! The new phonebook’s here!” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m somebody now! Millions of people look at this book everyday!” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m picking out a thermos for you.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m not a bum. I’m a jerk. I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends, and… uh… my thermos.” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “The jerk store called, they’re running out of you!” – Navin R. Johnson
  • “I’m sorry I’m not perfect, but I’m trying real hard.” – Navin R. Johnson

These quotes continue to be quoted and referenced in pop culture, showing the lasting impact of “The Jerk” and the wit of Steve Martin’s character Navin R. Johnson.

Funny dialogues you won’t forget from The Jerk

The Jerk is a 1979 comedy film that has become a cult classic. The movie is known for its hilarious dialogues that have stood the test of time. Here are some of the best quotes that will make you laugh out loud:

“I was born a poor black child.”

This famous line, spoken by Steve Martin’s character Navin Johnson, sets the tone for the film and gives a glimpse into the absurdity that follows.

“He hates these cans! Stay away from the cans!”

In one memorable scene, Navin tries to avoid an overzealous sniper who is shooting at cans. His frantic plea has become an iconic moment in the movie.

“I’m picking out a thermos for you. Not an ordinary thermos, for you. But the extra best thermos that you can buy, with vinyl and stripes and a cup built right in.”

Navin’s innocent enthusiasm for buying the perfect gift for his love interest is endearing and hilarious at the same time.

“The new phonebook’s here! The new phonebook’s here! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need! My name in print! That really makes somebody! Things are going to start happening to me now.”

In a classic moment of naivety, Navin gets excited about his name being in the phonebook. Little does he know that this is just the beginning of a series of misadventures.

“I’m somebody now! Millions of people look at this book everyday! This is the kind of stuff that really makes me mad! And if I don’t get my name in the next edition, I’ll kill myself!”

Navin’s exaggerated reaction to the possibility of not being in the next edition of the phonebook showcases his hilarious delusions of grandeur.

“It’s a profit deal. I’ll give you $2 for it.”

“But it’s worth $8!”

“Okay, $3.”

In one of the film’s many absurd moments, Navin tries to negotiate a fair price for an item, only to end up offering even less than his initial lowball offer.

“You mean I’m gonna stay this color?”

“I think so. It’s a non-fading dye. It’ll never wash off. It’ll never fade.”

“Whew!”

Navin’s reaction to the revelation that he will forever remain his current skin tone is comically exaggerated and perfectly captures his cluelessness.

These are just a few of the many funny dialogues from The Jerk that have made the movie a timeless comedy. If you haven’t seen it yet, make sure to add it to your watchlist for a good laugh!

The best quotes to remember from The Jerk Movie

2. “I don’t need anything, except this lamp” – Navin R. Johnson

3. “He hates these cans!” – Navin R. Johnson

4. “I’m picking out a Thermos for you. Not an ordinary Thermos for you. But the extra best Thermos that you can buy, with vinyl and stripes.” – Navin R. Johnson

5. “I’m somebody now! Millions of people look at this book every day! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity, your name in print, that makes people! I’m in print! Things are going to start happening to me now.” – Navin R. Johnson

6. “I’m sorry I ruined your lives, and crammed eleven cookies into the VCR.” – Navin R. Johnson

7. “I can see now. I’m glad I was blind for all those years.” – Navin R. Johnson

8. “And that’s the only thing I need is this. I don’t need this or this. Just this ashtray… And this paddle game. – The ashtray and the paddle game and that’s all I need… And this remote control. – The ashtray, the paddle game, and the remote control, and that’s all I need… And these matches. – The ashtray, and these matches, and the remote control, and the paddle ball… And this lamp. – The ashtray, this paddle game, and the remote control, and the lamp, and that’s all I need. And that’s all I need too. I don’t need one other thing, not one… I need this – The paddle game and the chair, and the remote control, and the matches for sure. – And this. – And that’s all I need. The ashtray, the remote control, the paddle game, this magazine, and the chair. – And I don’t need one other thing, except my dog. – I don’t need my dog. – I don’t need anything else either. I don’t need anything… Except my dog.” – Navin R. Johnson

9. “Stay away from the cans!” – Navin R. Johnson

10. “I know we’ve only known each other four weeks and three days, but to me, it seems like nine weeks and five days. The first day seemed like a week and the second day seemed like five days. And the third day seemed like a week again and the fourth day seemed like eight days. And the fifth day you went to see your mother and that seemed just like a day, and then you came back and later on the sixth day, in the evening, when we saw each other, that started seeming like two days, so in the evening it seemed like two days spilling over into the next day and that started seeming like four days, so at the end of the sixth day on into the seventh day, it seemed like a total of five days. And the sixth day seemed like a week and a half. I’ve passed the point of full on imbecile, your people have now found me mentally unfit in every way there is.”

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